


Distance

by JanitorBot



Series: XZero Week 2020 [6]
Category: Rockman X | Mega Man X, Rockman | Mega Man - All Media Types
Genre: Drabble, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:35:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22811086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JanitorBot/pseuds/JanitorBot
Summary: “It hurts, Zero. It really hurts. There's so many times I wondered why Dr. Light thought this was supposed to be a gift. This is one of them.”
Relationships: I think - Relationship, One-sided X/Zero, idk, whooooo - Relationship
Series: XZero Week 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1637977
Comments: 15
Kudos: 71





	Distance

**Author's Note:**

> XZero Week 2020 final day: Distance  
> I thought I could do an illustration for this one. I couldn't. Not for this one.

“You need to stop throwing yourself in front of me,” Zero growls as soon as they stepped into the elevator.

“And stand back and watch while you get hurt?” X replies heatedly.

They’ve had this routine before.

Yet no matter how many times they’ve had this argument, they’ve never truly settled it. Just like how X’s dream for everlasting peace will never happen, it’s a subject either of them will never compromise. Zero is distinctly aware of it.

It doesn’t make it any less fragging _frustrating._

“You could have died, X!”

“ _You_ could have died!” the Azure Hunter shoots back.

Because they may be highly capable combat-oriented androids but that doesn’t mean they’re invincible.

It doesn’t matter that X is called the Mega Man of this century. Zero knows the Elite Unit Leader’s strengths and weaknesses like his way around his own saber. X isn’t as capable in close quarter combat as he is with long range and his Titanium-X armor can’t save him if someone has the firepower to go through his more vulnerable areas like his waist.

A solid shot at his compact tank and spill the energen out of him. A clean slice at his neck and separate his processor from the rest of his frame. A blast into his core. There are so many ways for X to reach an early expiration date like any reploid.

Zero knows that better than anyone else. Too well for comfort.

X throws his hands in the air. “We’re _all_ at risk of getting hurt because of the nature of our work. I’d rather it be me than anyone else. It’s not just you, Zero!”

Without looking away from X, Zero punches the nearest wall with twenty-five tons of strength, consequences be damned; a repair mech can patch it up later.

“I can protect myself,” Zero says coolly after his violent demonstration, pulling his fist away to show the sizable dent in the metal. X glances at the damage exasperatedly. “You put yourself in an unnecessary position.”

“It doesn’t matter if you can protect yourself or not –“

“Yes it does because it means you’re overextending yourself irrationally,” Zero cuts it. “You’re emotionally compromised.”

“Emotionally compromised – “ X surges, insulted. “Emotions are integral to this! Why else am I a Hunter, Zero? I’m a Hunter because I care! I care about you, I care about everyone – “

“Then care about me less!”

_“How can I when I love you?!”_

Silence. 

It’s the quiet that happens after a bomb sets off. When the dust settle because it can. No one moves. No one makes a sound.

X blinks dumbly for a minute, appearing as shocked as Zero feels with what the Azure Hunter just said. The anger flushes out of the blue android instantly, replaced with mortification. He clasps a hand over his mouth as if that’ll take back his confession.

Their argument is now thoroughly murdered and tossed aside.

“You don’t mean it as a friend,” says Zero slowly.

“Zero, I…” X starts and stops. Bites his lips. Too vulnerable to lie.

It’s clear X didn’t mean to that out aloud. Zero has never seen him so anxious before.

Zero recovers from his surprise quickly. He narrows his eyes in open disapproval and X’s own widens at the sight.

“That’s irrelevant,” the Crimson Hunter declares dismissively. “If anything, that proves my point. You _are_ emotionally compromised, X. It’s wasteful.”

X stares blindly at the warbot. His voice is edged with confused panic. “What do you mean by that?”

Because Zero has never hesitated in any battle or mission, the words come out easily and bluntly as if he’s describing how to dismantle a military buster.

“Your ‘love’ is unnecessary,” says the Red Ripper, using the same tone as he would use against a loathed enemy, “because it won’t be reciprocated. We’re comrades. We’re friends. We can still be friends, but not as long as your emotions get in the way. Encode this to your drive.”

X recoils like Zero shot him. His face drains of all color like humans do when they lose blood. It’s incredibly at odds with the robotic nod he makes.

“Okay,” he says quietly. “Okay,” he says again.

Before Zero can say anything more, X stiffly twists on his heel and walks off in the opposite direction in a half-jog as if escaping.

It’s only when X turns around a corner that Zero shuts his eyes.

It’s better this way.

* * *

Neither of them have used their private communication channel for days.

Zero sees it hovering at the top of his recent logs history. The time stamp of their last conversation is pushed further and further back by the day. The last time that happened, Zero was AWOL late in the First Maverick War.

This time there’s neither Maverick nor a broken internal radio to blame for the silence.

It’s fine. If Zero really needed to relay something crucial to him such as mission detail or anything related to their work, Zero can reach out then. They can utilize the communication channel for its original professional intention. Perhaps with a little more time, X will understand the folly of his idiotic infatuation and see that he doesn’t want Zero that way. Then they’ll find a balance and they can talk like friends again.

It’s not until days later when Zero notices that their conversation string is gone that he calls X through the channel again.

_“This is a personal communications code sequence. Authorization from the recipient must be permitted to engage direct correspondence. For non-emergencies, please contact the following work code sequence to – “_

Zero stares off in space.

X not only deleted their conversation string from their mutual history, he also declassified Zero from a personal contact _._

It seems it’ll take longer than he initially assumed for their relationship to return to normal.

So be it.

* * *

It’s two weeks before Zero sees X again.

They had active call sessions precisely because they operate on opposite time shifts. The Seventeenth Unit usually covers the day while the Zeroth mainly covers the night. They don’t see each other as frequently as they used to before Sigma’s Rebellion. Still, there are times when Zero and X’s shifts overlap, allowing them to meet up in the canteen and refuel together. Not to mention, both SA-Rank Hunters have been assigned to long term, away missions before. Not seeing each other for months is not unusual to either of them.

It’s why Zero didn’t know how bad it was until later.

Zero’s threat assessment rings of a Critical-assigned entity as he approaches Command Center, which by process of elimination, has to be the Mega Man. The Commander and the Seventeenth Unit Leader are exchanging reports at the middle of the watch floor.

X notices the warbot first.

“I can draw up the numbers by tomorrow morning,” X relays back to Signas. He shares eye contact with Zero as he passes.

Not ignoring him but no words, no smile. Minimal acknowledgement.

Signas catches on the change immediately. He eyes X’s leaving back and looks at Zero meaningfully. “I won’t ask. It’s not my business unless it becomes my business. I just want to know if this won’t be a problem for future missions.”

“What do you mean?” asks Zero.

“That’s all I needed to know,” the former private investigator says, further confusing the Hunter.

Another week later Zero learns that X is going to transfer into the new Maverick Hunter station at the foot of Dushou Hill – located in an entirely different city state than Abel - at the end of the month. He’ll be overseeing and guarding the ongoing construction.

Which can last anywhere between one to two years.

* * *

A month can be overlooked. At least a year however? It’s bolts. The pettiness is so extreme Zero can’t believe it’s coming from X. The Father of All Reploids should know better. _Does_ know better.

Good thing he knows X’s schedule too and so Zero takes it upon himself to visit X’s quarters. He knocks on the door.

No one answers. Zero’s jaws lock in irritation.

“I know you’re in there, X,” he says, pounding the door harder. Combat mode confirms that the Blue Bomber is undoubtedly inside.

“Is it related to work?” X’s muffled voice comes through.

“Yes.”

X opens the door. “Hello Zero. What is it?”

“You’re avoiding me.”

The Azure Hunter’s eyes narrow. “You said this was related to work.”

“It is. You’re avoiding me to the point that you’re going to transfer to a different branch?”

“Why does it matter to you?”

The warbot scowls. “What if another war breaks out while you’re not here?”

“You’re operating on the logic that large-scale Maverick related incidents always occur in Abel City when that’s not the case,” X replies emotionlessly. “There are reploids and consequently Mavericks all over the globe. Abel City’s Maverickism doesn’t take higher priority than any other city’s.”

“Except Abel City has the highest Maverick rate in the world and we both know that is Sigma strikes, he’ll aim for Abel because he always aimed for Abel.”

“Because he aims for the Hunters. Specifically, me. Who knows. Maybe if I’m in a different city, he’ll bring his war there instead. We can test the hypothesis.”

Zero snarls. “No matter how much you dress it up, you _are_ avoiding me. I told you to get over your emotions, not to cut off all contact from me. We belong in the same faction and we still need to work together. You running off to a different city isn’t the answer.”

X gapes. He stares frozen for so long that Zero is about to inquire if he’s suffering a short-circuit when he covers his face with a hand. A muffled shrill erupts behind his fingers like he’s being stabbed.

The Blue Bomber snatches his hand back, revealing a pair of furious green eyes, shining with unshed tears. Zero has only seen that expression targeted at Mavericks, but he has never been at the receiving end of it. The full brunt of it freezes him.

Then X takes a deep breath. Exvents it out.

“You told me you don’t want me and that’s okay. I have nothing against you for that. Eventually I’ll solder myself together and we can put this behind us. Because you’re _right.”_

“…I am?” Zero manages, not expecting that.

“I am emotionally compromised. I love you, Zero.” X’s face warp with such sheer, open pain that it’s incredible and horrible to watch. “I want nothing more than you to be alive and well. I wasn’t going to tell you because I was already content. But it’s out there, and now that I know my feelings _inconvenience_ you?” he says, barking out a tearful laugh. “It hurts, Zero. It really hurts. There's so many times I wondered why Dr. Light thought this was supposed to be a gift. This is one of them."

 _This was an error,_ Zero thinks feeling far away. The more X talks, the more Zero’s power distributors feel like they’re tangling all up in each other. X speaks like he’s drowning in oil. Wretched and ready to burn.

(Zero thought this was something small. Something foolish and temporary because how can X possibly love the accursed robot that nearly killed him after Eurasia fell?)

“You don’t deserve to have that burden, Zero. But I don’t know how we can go back to how we used to be when those are the choices you gave me. I grew to love you. I can grow out of it too.” Walking backwards, X is back in his room again. “I need the distance until I can center myself. I respect your emotions, Zero. Please respect mine.”

The door slides shut like a casket lid.

Unthinkingly, Zero raises a hand slowly. Places it on his chest and claws at it. Bewildered.

It hurts.


End file.
